I’d have to say that this really was a prayer walk. Thinking/praying for her, her family and friends. In fact, sometimes it feels that life is just one big prayer, and certainly we can experience it as such. Pray without ceasing; think prayerful without ceasing; live prayerfully without ceasing. It takes practice, but, believe me, it’s easy and worthwhile. I say the Jesus Prayer, Lord Jesus Christ have mercy on me. When you find your mind is chattering trivia (How many times to I have to go over the evening’s menu?), give it a try.
This morning, instead of strolling on the beach, I walked up to the lighthouse, giving tribute as I went to a friend who had recently died. You see, we used to talk about this particular spot that she loved.
I’d have to say that this really was a prayer walk. Thinking/praying for her, her family and friends. In fact, sometimes it feels that life is just one big prayer, and certainly we can experience it as such. Pray without ceasing; think prayerful without ceasing; live prayerfully without ceasing. It takes practice, but, believe me, it’s easy and worthwhile. I say the Jesus Prayer, Lord Jesus Christ have mercy on me. When you find your mind is chattering trivia (How many times to I have to go over the evening’s menu?), give it a try.
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The idea of praying without ceasing has always intrigued me. Two years ago when I began aprayerdiary, I wrote about the Jesus Prayer, Lord Jesus Christ have mercy on me, a sinner. The prayer comes from the Eastern Orthodox tradition and particularly from Startets, the spiritual guides of Russia. “Pray without ceasing (1 Thess. 5:17) were the very words that compelled the Staret to set out on his journey in “A Way of the Pilgrim”. I have been saying the Jesus Prayer for over three years. It’s very simple to do; just say the phrase over and over again (I leave out the a sinner part). I started by reciting it out loud, but soon I noticed that I was thinking it, and that was just fine. It has become my meditation mantra, which I say while watching the sunrise here at the cottage, walking the beach, doing the dishes, driving in the car, going to sleep, you name it. Nowadays I often ‘say’ the prayer without even thinking about; it must be in my unconscious, or should I say, in my heart? The following is from The Mountain of Silence: A Search for Orthodox Spirituality, by Kyriacos C. Markides. The quotes are attributed to Father Maximos, an Anthonte monk and friend of Markides. “It (the Jesus Prayer) is the practical way of mobilizing the mechanism of the heart to open up to Grace….embedded in the name of Jesus is the very power of God. By invoking, therefore, the sacred name repeatedly we invite the Grace of God to take possession of hour hearts and mind, protecting us from harmful effects. “{The Prayer}opens the road for Grace to visit the heart. And when that happens, then the heart works by itself independently of whatever else you do. It enters into an ongoing relationship with God" (p.56). The original plan was that Izzie would be going home today; but no, she staying another week. This means that I’ll have to continuing to work around her early morning visits to the Angel Room. I’m trying my best to spend my first fifteen minutes in meditation before beginning my usual morning routine in the AR. This means NO coffee, which is a challenge in and of itself--although sitting in the silence, breathing in and out, is a bigger one. My mind wants to plan the day, etc., etc., etc. I’m finding this early meditation practice stops me from jumpstarting into a day that gets filled with ‘to dos’ and selfish desires. (Not that that doesn’t happen.) It’s hard work to stick with the practice, and as long as I have Izzie to distract me, I have a living excuse. On the other hand, over the past few years I’ve been ‘saying’ the Jesus Prayer: “Jesus Christ have mercy on me.” And so, even as Izzie stalks across my lap, this prayer serves me in these wee small hours. BTW, I love Izzie and don’t mind that her vacation has been lengthened. “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” You know that one; we say it all the time and I admit that it’s quite the norm for me to repeat the words without thinking about them at all. Like The Jesus Prayer they go right to my subconscious, and there’s nothing wrong with that. The repetition sink in, which is all for the good. Good also happens when we consciously ponder the words, which I did this morning. It occurred to me that as far as forgiving others their trespasses, that not a big issue for me. I don’t hold many grudges; I usually don’t feel attacked by what others do; I don’t take much personally. It just isn’t where my energy needs to go. Instead, my forgiving focuses on forgiving myself. Perhaps that’s where vanity comes in, taking the sinful form of wanting to be perfect. If I could treat myself like I treat others, if I could forgive myself as easily as I forgive others, God’s will would “be done on earth as it is in heaven.” The little boy with terminal cancer is now with God. He is no longer suffering. Please pray for his family. My blogging days go by so fast. I think I’ve just posted and then realize that that three days have gone by. Chronos and kairos time, all mixed together. The days go by, I lead my life, God is always there. Well, I say “always’ but sometimes I forget God, and then when I remember I am grateful. Of course God is always there, even when I forget God. For over a year now, I’ve been saying the Jesus prayer, that prayer of the Way of the Pilgrim, “Lord Jesus Christ have mercy on me.” It’s become a wonderful habit so that often I find myself saying it unconsciously in my mind. Sometimes I repeat it when I pray for others, saying a particular name in place of “me”. The other day I was offered another benefit. I was at the cottage in the recliner on the deck beginning my prayer time. It takes me a while to settle into it, to empty my mind of chatter, so I say the Jesus Prayer. I started, and repeated, “Jesus Christ have mercy on me.” Then I heard, not with my ears, but as Benedict said in his Rule, “Listen with the ear of your heart.” I heard Jesus say, “Here I am.” When I mention another beautiful sunrise, I’m often thinking about the morning twilight, when myriad colors through the streaks of clouds light up the horizon. That was the way it was this morning, and I was grateful. Although I couldn’t recall the particulars, I had awoken from dreams about my mother dying, and I was sad. So as I sat on the deck, just watching, and pretty soon I realized that I was saying the Jesus prayer, “Jesus Christ, have mercy on me.” A certain sadness remained but I was uplifted. I wasn’t alone any more nor did I feel purposeless. I doubt that my mom ever prayed the Jesus prayer, but Jesus was her guide for her entire life. What a legacy. This is your new blog post. Click here and start typing, or drag in elements from the top bar.
The other evening I attended a session of Centering Prayer at one of the local churches. What a challenge to sit there in “intentional silence” and let the mind go, to “follow the breath” or, with a sacred word, such as “Jesus” or “be still,” direct the mind back to nothing. Cynthia Bourgeault, in her book, Centering Prayer and Inner Awakening, tells us: “Perhaps the most powerful argument (for Centering Prayer) is the one from authority. Virtually every spiritual tradition that holds a vision of human transformation at its heart also claims that a practice of intentional silence is a non-negotiable. Period. You just have to do it.” When I listen to God, I hear just that, that I have to do it. Um, am I hearing that I must take some time not to listen to God? We are told that twenty minutes twice a day is all that is required, so I am going to give it a go and see if I can establish a Centering Prayer habit. When I remember the “Jesus Prayer” experience that I started a few months ago, I have faith that I can do this one. I began saying, “Jesus Christ have mercy on me, ” whenever I remembered, and although I certainly don’t pray without ceasing, I feel I pray it frequently enough to accept that I have formed a habit. I’ll let you know how I get along with the Centering Prayer. I’ll confess the ups and the downs, the successes and the “try agains.” Good morning,
The sun has just appeared over the horizon here at the cottage by the sea. I am in awe once again. As the song goes, “There’s Gotta be a God Somewhere.” I’ll write more later today, but I had to put that—God’s magnificence-- out there at the start of the day, and the start of this blog. I’m just had what I call my ‘prayer nap’. Here’s how it goes. I lie on the chaise in the living room (which I call the deck) of the cottage that I’m renting. If I keep my eyes open I have a beautiful view of the ocean; but I close them and even put sun visors over my eyes. The challenge is to stop all the chatter in my head, so I concentrate on the Jesus Prayer and slowly fall asleep; miraculously that always happens. Usually after the sleeping part of my prayer nap which is no longer than a half hour, I wake up to one of my best prayer times. My mind is pretty much free of what I call “ego chatter”--planning what’s for supper—that kind of thing: and of judgments about what I think that the people I’m praying for should do. How easy it can be to let “my will done” slip in. You may be wondering why I’m giving you all this detail. Well, it’s because I would love to hear how other people pray, what they do, what they think about, and I figure I’m not alone. There isn’t much written about this kind of thing. Even Jesus doesn’t give us much. Aside from the Lord’s Prayer, scripture tells us that Jesus went off and prayed. But what did he do, what did he say? Finally, you may notice that I don’t seem to pray in any orthodox way. I don’t follow any rules. For example, “they” say that one should not lie down, close eyes, or do anything to encourage sleep when praying. But that pretty much what I do. Just me and God. Yesterday was a strange prayer day. I did fine with my morning routine but then a friend and her two children came to visit. We had a wonderful time walking the beach and having lunch, but I got caught up in the moment and so prayer and God disappeared from my consciousness. Now, that’s not a bad thing (it actually happens a lot), but I am trying to pray without ceasing, which is mighty hard to remember to do. It’s the remembering that’s the problem, not the desire.
I’m reading (for the second time) “The Way of a Pilgrim” written in Russia in the nineteenth century by an anonymous pilgrim who wanders about the country side saying and studying the prayer of the heart, also know as the ‘Jesus prayer’: “Lord Jesus Christ have mercy upon me.” The idea is to say/think the prayer continually so that it becomes part of you--going from something you repeat in words to something you say in your heart. The idea intrigues me, actually appeals to me, and so I say it whenever I remember. It helps me become calm and remember God and my purpose. It also gets me out of all that right brain thinking, or as I say, it gets me out of my head. Again, the challenge is to remember. One of my best remembering times is when I wake up in the middle of the night. Saying the ‘Jesus prayer’ helps me stop thinking about all that’s going on in my life and thus I fall back to sleep more easily. |
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